Self Destruct
by starkiller19
Summary: After making a mistake in battle, Prompto falls into a dangerous habit. Warning: self harm
1. Chapter 1

Prompto stared out the window of the regalia at the passing trees, tapping his fingers against his leg. The four were on their way to kill a group of six or seven seadevils that resided near the Vesperpool. If he had to be honest with himself, Prompto felt way too tired to be dealing with these creatures today. The stress of everything that happened since they left Insomnia finally caught up with him, and he struggled sleeping more than a few hours a night. He rubbed at his burning eyes, turning his head to try and work out a kink in his neck.

"Do we really have to fight these things?" he asked, a hint of hope in his voice.

"We went over this already, Prompto," Ignis replied never taking his eyes off the road. "We're running low on gil and this hunt pays well."

Prompto huffed, leaning his head back against the headrest and closing his eyes. His mind continued to wander as he tried to get at least a few minutes of extra sleep. How Noctis could fall asleep so easily in the car was beyond him. He shifted a few times, trying but failing to find a comfortable position. He groaned quietly as he sat up straight again, giving up on the idea. As he flipped through different radio stations, Prompto felt eyes staring at him. Turning around he locked eyes with Gladio, who glared at him. Prompto turned back around, deciding to leave the radio alone for now.

"How much longer?" Prompto asked.

"Only a few minutes now," the advisor replied. They rode in silence until Ignis pulled the car over and parked. Gladio roughly shook the prince who jolted awake. They all walked the small path to the Vesperpool, summoning their weapons as a low growl sounded nearby.

"Uh, guys, I think the poster was wrong," Prompto said, wide eyes scanning the area. Ahead he could see at least twice the amount the poster had said.

"We can handle it." Noctis said, charging the monsters. The others followed, each attacking a different monster. Prompto let off a shot, missing the monster by an inch, but it got the seadevils attention. It snapped as it charged at him. He stumbled back, rolling to the side as it pounced on the spot where he had been laying a second before. He steadied his shaking hands, and with one shot the monster fell to the ground motionless. He caught his breath, turning around just in time to see another monster charge at him. He jumped out of the way, but his reaction was too slow, and the monster grabbed his leg. He rolled around on the ground, trying to get the monster to release its hold, kicking it in the face. The seadevil finally let go, and Prompto crawled away from it, sending a barrage of bullets in its direction. Most of the bullets missed, and the monster kept running at him. His shaking hands made aiming impossible. The seadevil was merely a foot away when Gladio jumped in front of Prompto, swinging his large sword and stopping the monster in its tracks.

"Wake up!" Gladio shouted at him as he pulled him to his feet. Prompto nodded, avoiding putting much pressure on his injured leg. Looking around, he could see that the others had just finished up with the rest of the monsters.

"What was that?!" Gladio growled, arms crossed. "You almost got yourself killed!"

"S-sorry. Feeling a little sluggish today," Prompto said. He plopped down on the ground and pulled the leg of his pants up so he could look at the injury. Chunks of flesh had been ripped from his leg, and blood flowed heavily from the wound.

"That looks nasty," Noct told him as he reached into his pocket. "Use this." He handed the potion to the blonde who took it in his hand and crushed it. He watched as most of the wound closed up. All that was left were a few light colored scars.

"Thanks," he said, as Noctis helped him to his feet.

"Let's return and get the reward," Ignis said, already heading to the regalia. Prompto sighed to himself, following a little behind the others.

 _You screwed up AGAIN,_ the little voice inside his head screamed at him. _Gladio had to risk his life to save you. You could have gotten him killed. Your nothing but a mistake. A failure. FAILURE. FAILURE!_ He clenched his fists, nails digging into his palms as he struggled to hold back the burning tears that threatened to fall. He took a shaky breath and stared at his feet as he tried to clear his head. He only looked up when he bumped into Gladio who had stopped now that they had reached the regalia.

"Watch it," the older growled.

"Sorry," Prompto said, hopping in the passenger seat.

The drive back was unusually quiet. Ignis glanced over at Prompto who was staring at the dashboard, eyes void of emotion.

"Everything alright?" he asked. He received no answer so he looked over at the blond. Prompto hadn't moved an inch. It was like he didn't even hear him. "Prompto. Prompto!" The blond finally looked up, his blue eyes shining a little more than usual.

"Uh, yeah?" he asked, clearing his throat.

"Is everything alright?" he repeated.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Prompto replied, shifting in his seat. He closed his eyes, relieved that the voices stopped. He rubbed at his eyes, trying to ease the burning sensation, but he succeeded in only making it worse. The rest of the ride was silent. Ignis pulled into the outpost, and they walked to the restaurant to retrieve the reward.

"Wonderful," Ignis said as they exited the left the building. "This will be enough to last us a good while. We can even afford a hotel room tonight."

"Yeah!" Noctis cheered. Gladio grumbled something about wanting to camp in the great outdoors, but the four friends made their way to the hotel. Once in their room, Prompto dropped his luggage on the floor and flopped face first on one of the beds.

"I'll make some dinner," Ignis said, making his way to the kitchen. The others busied themselves with other things. Prompto closed his eyes as he sleep pulled at him. He was startled awake by Gladio who gave him a not so gentle shove.

"Food's ready," Gladio said, heading into the kitchen. Prompto groaned pushing himself off the bed, stumbling a little as he followed. Noctis, Ignis, and Gladio were already sitting at the table eating. Prompto sat the empty seat, a bowl of soup already sitting on the table. He stared at the food, but he didn't take a bite. He honestly didn't feel hungry and the smell of the soup made him feel sick. He pushed the soup around with his spoon, zoning out as the three around him made idle conversation.

If the others noticed anything off about the blond, they didn't say anything. Ignis grabbed all the bowls, asking Prompto if he was finished when he saw he hadn't taken a single bite. Prompto nodded as he stared at the table. Ignis frowned as he grabbed the bowl and dumped its contents.

"I'm heading to bed," Prompto told the others, getting up from the table.

"A little early, don't you think?" Noctis asked, propping his feet up on the chair across from him. Prompto simply shrugged as he walked into the bedroom and flopped onto one of the beds. Sleep never came, and before he knew it the others joined him. Noctis climbed into the bed next to him, and Prompto shifted a little to give him more room. Soon the snores of the other three filled the room. He tossed and turned watching as 1:00 went by then 2:00. _I just want to sleep,_ his mind screamed, tears pouring out of his tired eyes.

His mind wandered back to the events of the day, and soon the voice had returned screaming at him. _Your a mistake. A failure. Stupid. Clumsy._ The words repeated over and over, and Prompto gripped his ears, a small whimper escaping his lips. Prompto stumbled out of bed, heading out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. He leaned against the counter, silently crying as the voices relentlessly pounded him. His anger at himself grew, and catching a glimpse of one of Ignis's kitchen knives on the counter, he grabbed it. He didn't know why, but he placed it against his skin, shaking hands struggling to keep it steady. Pressing down gently, he slid the blade across his wrist, gasping quietly as it stung. He watched the the blood run down his hand, dripping into the kitchen sink. He felt some of his anger dissipate, and he cut again, and again, until all his anger, frustration and sadness disappeared leaving him numb. He grabbed a few paper towels and held them against the cuts in an attempt to stop the bleeding. Once it had stopped considerably, he cleaned the blood off the knife and threw the paper towels in the trash, adding more clean ones to the top in order to hide the blood. He placed one of his wrist bands over the cuts, grabbed the knife again, and walked back into the bedroom. Making sure no one woke up while he was gone, Prompto shoved the kitchen knife in his bag and hid it under some of his clothes. He climbed back in bed, feeling more at ease than he had in weeks. He pulled the covers up to his chin, drifting off to sleep with ease.


	2. Chapter 2

Prompto woke to the sound of Ignis's alarm, and a small smile spread across his lips as he realized that he slept soundly for the first time that week. He stretched his arms, rubbing his eyes with a yawn. Ignis grabbed his glasses off of the table beside his bed and took his phone, letting it ring a little while longer in an attempt to wake the sleeping prince. After another minute he shut it off with a sigh, watching as Gladio gently shook the prince. Noctis groaned, rolling over so his back was to the shield.

"Get up," Gladio grumbled, shaking him harder.

"Fine. I'm up," the prince replied, his voice muffled by the covers. "You look well rested," he said, looking at Prompto. The other simply shrugged, avoiding Noctis's gaze.

"I'll make breakfast, then we can figure out where to go from here," Ignis said as he left the bedroom.

"I'm gonna get a quick shower," Prompto told the others. Closing the bathroom door, he turned the shower on and stepped in. He let the water run over his face, enjoying the feeling of the hot water on his tight muscles. He hissed at the burning sensation in his wrist as the water hit the cuts from last night. Scrubbing away the dried blood on his arm, he brushed his fingers over the marks. He picked at the scabs that had already started forming, watching as they began to bleed again. _Why did you do that? You shouldn't have hurt yourself,_ he thought to himself. He grit his teeth and pounded on his arm as the guilt grew inside him. The pain helped calm his anger and soon it was completely gone. He turned the water off and grabbed a towel, drying off. He quickly dressed and walked into the kitchen where Ignis was just finishing up breakfast. He placed the plates on the table, and they sat down, digging into the eggs. Prompto pushed his eggs around, taking a small bite. He really didn't feel like eating at the moment, but he knew he had to. Looking around he noticed that everyone else had already finished eating while he had barely eaten half. He shrugged his shoulders and scraped the rest of the eggs into the trash can.

"That's odd," Ignis said, eyes darting around the kitchen. He had been in the middle of packing up his kitchen utensils when he noticed something was missing.

"What's up, Iggy?" Noctis asked.

"I had two kitchen knives with me, but now I only have one," he replied, rummaging around in his bag. "Have any of you seen it?"

The other's shook their heads, and Prompto shuddered feeling a little bit of guilt.

"Oh well. I'll just have to buy a new one. They aren't that expensive." They grabbed their bags and dropped the key off at the front desk, heading to the regalia.

"So, where are we headed," Prompto asked, playing with his wrist band as they pulled out of the hotel's parking lot.

"We should go to Old Lestallum. Dave is there trying to hunt down some tags and I figured he could use our help," Gladio suggested from the back seat.

"Sounds good to me," Noctis replied.

Prompto fiddled with his camera, flipping through pictures. A small smile spread across his lips as he stopped on a picture of Gladio holding Noctis in a headlock. He took pictures of the scenery as they drove and frowned when he realized most of them were blurry. He put his camera back, settling on just enjoying the view. The drive seemed to take much longer than he thought it should have, but eventually they reached Old Lestallum. Ignis parked the regalia, and they quickly located Dave who was standing next to a large building, his loyal dog lying at his feet.

"You guys here to help with the tags?" he asked. They nodded, and he told them the area where they could find them. He wished them luck, and they climbed back in the regalia. As they drove, Prompto suddenly noticed that his wrist itched. He scratched at the cuts, but he only succeeded in making them itch more. He tapped his fingers against his thigh in frustration as he fought the urge to scratch them. He knew it would draw attention from the others if he relentlessly scratched at his wrist. He gritted his teeth as the whispering voice returned. _You're so worthless._ He shook his head, trying to clear it. _Even your own parents don't want anything to do with you_. That one hit him hard. It had always hurt when he spent days at a time home alone. _Shut up. Shut up! SHUT UP!_

He sighed in relief as the voice disappeared. He knew it was only gone temporarily, but he would take what he could get. When they pulled over, the sun had already begun to set, leaving an orange hue in the dark sky.

"Let's grab these tags and camp here for the night," Gladio said as they passed a haven.

Prompto and Noctis groaned, but they knew they'd never get back to civilization before the daemons came out. As they reached the spot where Dave said the tags should be, they came across a group of sabertusks.

"Let's end this quickly," Gladio growled, summoning his sword. Noctis threw his sword and disappeared, landing a fatal blow to one of the creatures. Prompto summoned his gun, focusing on keeping the creatures from overwhelming the others. Four of the creatures surrounded Noctis, so Prompto steadied his hand, aiming for the one closest to Noctis. He fired three shots, each hitting their mark. The beast fell to the ground lifeless, and the prince quickly finished off the other three.

"I believe we have what we are looking for," Ignis said as he held up the dog tags.

They set up camp at the haven, and Ignis set to cooking. He decided on making rice balls since they were simple and quick to make. Prompto watched the crackling fire, enjoying the warmth it emitted.

"Dinner is ready," Ignis said, placing the rice balls on four plates. They each grabbed one and sat around the fire. Prompto stared at the food, and sighed in frustration. His appetite still hadn't returned, but he forced himself to eat at least one of them.

Ignis watched with interest as the blond took a tiny bite and swallowed, a look of disinterest on his face. His gaze remained on Prompto. He wanted to make sure the blond ate all of his food. Thinking back to the last few days, Ignis couldn't remember him finishing even half of the food the advisor gave to him. When Prompto went to throw out the rest of his food, Ignis cleared his throat, getting the other's attention.

"Please try to eat a little more," he said, taking a bite of his own food. "We wouldn't want good food to go to waste."

"I'm not hungry," Prompto mumbled as he dropped his gaze to the ground. Prompto risked a glance up at the advisor's face and winced at the clear look of disapproval.

Ignis decided to leave him alone. If Prompto didn't start eating more soon, he would have to do something, but at the moment he wasn't to worried. The last few weeks had been pretty stressful, and he knew everyone was dealing with it in their own way.

"I think I'm gonna go to bed," Noctis said, standing up and heading to the tent.

"We all should," Gladio said as he and Ignis followed the prince. "You coming?" the shield asked, looking back at Prompto who hadn't moved from his chair yet.

"I'll be there in a few minutes," the other replied.

He sat in silence, watching the flames flicker. He glanced at the tent where the others were and a small voice whispered inside him. _You don't belong. You're not like them. The only reason you're even on this trip is because Noct pities you. That's the only reason he lets you follow him around._ He closed his eyes and shook his head. _You're wrong. He's my friend. He cares about me,_ he argued back. _You'll never be as good as them._ He took a shaky breath, and made his way to the tent. _Maybe a good night sleep will clear your head,_ he said to himself as he crawled in to lay beside Noctis. He stared at the top of the tent as minutes slowly passed. He tossed and turned, but sleep never came. He groaned checking the time on his phone. 3:24. _Not again,_ he thought to himself, getting up quietly and leaving the tent. The fire was still burning, so he sat down next to it. _You know what helped this last time,_ the voice told him. _I-I can't,_ he argued with himself. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't. His bag was in the back of the tent. He would have to crawl over everybody to get to it. _It doesn't have to be a knife._ His eyes drifted over to the fire which was still burning bright. _It'll help you sleep. I'll go away._ He wanted that. He wanted relief from the pounding voice in his head. He grabbed a piece of wood from the fire and stared at the glowing embers. Biting his lip, he hesitantly lowered the piece of wood, holding it just above his left arm. _I shouldn't do this,_ he told himself. _Come on you worthless piece of shit! Just do it!_ He quickly placed the hot edge onto his arm, gritting his teeth at the searing pain. He held it there for a few seconds, then dropped the stick with a silent sob. He sat there for a few moments, tears streaming down his face, and soon he felt his eyes drifting closed.


	3. Chapter 3

Ignis woke up before his alarm like usual. He glanced around the tent noticing all the others were still asleep. Well, all except one. He frowned as he noticed the spot where the blond usually slept was empty. Pushing his glasses up his nose, he exited the tent. Ignis found Prompto curled up in one of the camping chairs, and Ignis smiled, seeing that Prompto was finally sleeping peacefully. He heard his alarm go off from inside the tent followed by a loud groan from the shield. Soon Gladio and Noctis crawled out of the tent, the latter looking dead tired.

"I hate camping," he mumbled as he plopped down in one of the camping chairs.

"Wimp," Gladio replied. He glanced down at Prompto a slight look of confusion crossing his face. "Did he sleep out here all night?"

"It would appear so," Ignis said, pulling out his cooking supplies.

"Good idea. That chair is probably more comfortable than the ground," Noctis complained.

"Wake him up, would you?" Ignis asked. Noctis reached over, shaking his friend.

"Leave me alone," he mumbled, shifting in the chair. The prince rolled his eyes as he lightly tapped his cheek. "Fine, I'm up."

Prompto winced at the burning sensation in his left arm. He glanced down at the limb, shocked to see a few small bubbles on the bright red strip where he had burned it. He gently touched them, biting back a cry of pain.

"That looks pretty nasty," a gruff voice said behind him. He jumped, turning to see Gladio standing behind his chair with his arms crossed over his chest as he stared down at his burned arm. "What happened?"

"Huh? Oh, I, uh, I was really cold, and I accidentally got a little too close to the fire," he replied, mentally cursing himself as he subconsciously placed his hand over it. He realized it was a horrible excuse, but he never was good when he was put on the spot. Gladio scowled down at the blond, and Prompto knew he wasn't buying it. Luckily, he decided to just shrug it off and let it go.

Ignis handed the plates of food to the others. While they talked, Prompto leaned forward in his chair as if he were engaged in the conversation. The moment the others weren't looking, he dumped half of his food into the fire, quickly placing the plate back on his lap. He shoved his fork in the food, taking a small bite. The first bite brought a wave of nausea, but he pushed through taking a few more bites.

They packed up their things and made their way back to the car. As they walked back, a wave of dizziness hit Prompto, and he stumbled, leaning against the trunk of a nearby tree as he waited for it to pass.

"Are you alright?" Ignis asked, placing a hand on the blond's back.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied. "I just tripped over a tree root." Ignis nodded, accepting his answer, but he let his hand hover near the blond for a few seconds in case the other stumbled again. Prompto pushed himself off the tree once the dizziness had passed, and they continued on. He was relieved when they finally made it to the car and he could sit down. He felt exhausted for some reason, and not long after he sat down, he found himself drifting off to sleep.

Ignis glanced over quickly at the blond, and seeing his eyes were closed he called his name. He got no answer so he decided now would be a good time to bring up his recent behavior.

"I think something's wrong with Prompto," Ignis told the others.

"Yeah, he hasn't been eating much lately," Gladio agreed with a nod.

"At least he's sleeping again," Noctis added optimistically. They were all aware that Prompto struggled finding sleep for the past few weeks. They knew recent events were taken their toll on him, and they decided to just give him some time and hoped it resolved itself. "Maybe we should just take a few days to relax at a hotel. He might just need a break."

"That's a good idea, Noct," Ignis said with a nod. Gladio reluctantly agreed, though he would much rather spend those days camping.

"I guess everybody could use a break," he grumbled, crossing his arms.

Prompto woke to someone shaking his shoulders gently. He opened his eyes, squinting against the blinding sun as he stretched his arms. "Are we there?" he asked when he noticed the car was no longer moving.

"Yes," Ignis replied, hoping out of the car. "Why don't the three of you go get a motel room. I'll take these tags to Dave." Gladio nodded, leading the other to the motel nearby.

"We're staying in a motel again?" Prompto asked, a large smile on his face.

"Yup. We're staying a few days," Noctis replied as Gladio talked to the man at the front desk of the motel. "We all could use a little break."

Prompto nodded, though he didn't feel as relieved as he should. They're putting the trip on hold for you, the voice in his head said. You're holding them back. They can see that you can't keep up with them. Prompto gritted his teeth as self loathing bubbled inside him. He picked at the scabs on his wrist as they entered their room. His usual smile faded from his face as he struggled to keep the voice at bay. He was tired of pretending he was fine. He was tired of just surviving. He felt like he was drowning.

He was so lost in thought he didn't even notice Ignis had come in until the advisor placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. Prompto flinched slightly startled out of his thoughts.

"What's up Iggy?" he asked as he cleared his throat.

"I've been talking to you for the past minute. Haven't you been listening?" he replied, a frown on his face as he stared at the confused blond.

"You, you were? Sorry, Iggy, I didn't hear you."

Prompto's face fell as Ignis let out an exasperated sigh. "Never mind, Prompto. It's not worth repeating." The blond plopped down in one of the chairs, sinking as far into the cushions as he could. He chewed on his lip as he tried to keep the tears from falling.

"I'm going to go get some ingredients for tonight," Ignis told the others heading for the door. "Gladio, would you mind coming with me?" The shield nodded and followed Ignis out the door. Noctis sat in the chair across from Prompto, leaning his arms on his knees.

"Are you okay?" he asked as he scanned his friends face, a look of concern etched on his own. Prompto smiled, but he knew it wasn't very convincing. Trying to get the others to believe he was okay was getting harder and harder as the days wore on.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied. Noctis frowned at him, not believing a word he said, but he didn't want to push him.

"Wanna play King's Knight?" the prince asked, a smile growing on his face.

"You're on!" Prompto said with a hint of his usual enthusiasm. They sat playing on their phones, and for the first time in a long time, Prompto felt happy.

The other two returned, plastic shopping bags in hand, and Ignis set to making dinner. He decided to make Prompto's favorite food in hopes of coaxing him to eat more than he had been recently. Gladio eyed the blond as he and the prince played on their phones, watching for anything that would tell them what was going on with him. The smile on his face seemed a little forced, and the dark bags that had been under his eyes for the past week looked darker than Gladio would have ever thought possible, but those were the only things besides the burn on his arm. Suddenly, he noticed a small cut peeking out from under his wristband. Weird, he thought to himself as he stared at the gash. I don't remember him saying he was hurt. Must not be bad.

Prompto felt the burning sensation of eyes boring into him, and out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Gladio staring at him. He self consciously played with his wristband as he nervously chewed on his lip.

"So are we planning on doing some hunts while we stay here?" he asked, glancing over his shoulder at Ignis.

"No. I think we could all use a few days to rest without fighting for our lives," the advisor replied, not looking up from the stove.

The four of them ate, and Ignis noticed Prompto barely touched his. He tried to persuade the blond to at least eat a little bit, but the other claimed he wasn't hungry again. Ignis hated that he didn't know what was wrong with him. He hated that he couldn't help him, but if Prompto didn't open up to him, he couldn't do anything.

Soon Noctis headed for bed, quickly followed by the others. Prompto laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling as he listened to the snores coming from the others. He drifted off to sleep a few times just to be jerked awake for some unknown reason, and his frustration grew as he looked at the clock and saw it 4:23. His mind began to wander, and soon the ever persistent voice returned. Gladio saw your cut and the burn. He'll hate you if he finds out. He's not really your friend. None of them are. Prompto squeezed his eyes shut, begging the voice to go away. You know it's true. You can't fight. You're weak. Prompto pushed himself off the bed and grabbed his bag as he walked into the bathroom. He figured if he was up he might as well get ready for the day. He closed the door, making sure to lock it behind him. He stared at his reflection in the mirror, gripping the sink so tightly that his knuckles started turning white. Suddenly, he couldn't breathe. Panic filled him as he gasped for air, trying to stop his heart from beating so fast. Calm down. Nothing's wrong. Breathe. Just breathe, Prompto, he said to himself as he tried to slow his breathing. He slid down the wall, falling to the ground as he took a deep breath and held it for a few seconds before slowly letting it back out. He did this a few more times until his breathing was back to normal. An anxiety attack. I haven't had one of those in a long time. He stood back up, and turned the faucet on, splashing cool water on his face.

You're so stupid. You're weak. You're pathetic. You're nothing. Prompto dug his nails into the palms of his hands as the internal war waged on. Please, just leave me alone. I just want to be happy again. Suddenly the knife in his bag popped into his mind. You know what you have to do to be happy again. He shook his head, looking at the bag next to him. It doesn't last, he told himself, knowing he would feel guilty about it if he did it again. But you get some relief. The voice goes away for a bit. He felt tears fall as he unzipped his bag, pulling out the kitchen knife from the bag.

He rested the blade against his skin, hesitating just a little before slicing his skin. Self loathing boiled inside him and he pressed harder, making a second cut then a third. He bit his lip as he watched the blood flow from the cut. There was more blood than he thought, and he knew he had cut deeper than he intended to. The knife slipped from his grasp, striking the tile with a loud clang. Prompto remained silent, hoping the noise didn't wake the others. He heard the squeak of one of the beds followed by the sound of footsteps. "Ah, shit," he whispered to himself as the footsteps stopped outside the bathroom door.


	4. Chapter 4

A loud clang startled Ignis from his sleep, and he sat up straight, tired eyes darting around the room. Seeing no immediate danger, he waited a few seconds for his racing heart to calm down. He grabbed his glasses off the nightstand and checked on all the others. Gadio was snoring loudly beside him, and Noctis was fast asleep in the other bed. He noticed an empty spot next to the prince, and he pushed himself off the bed, looking around for Prompto. He stopped at the closed bathroom door and saw a tiny bit of light shining out from under the door. He knocked lightly on the door and heard a soft thud from inside the room.

"Prompto, are you alright?" he asked, knocking again as his concern began to grow.

He heard no reply, and suddenly his concern turned to full blown panic. He reached for the handle and tried to push the door open, but it was locked. He backed up and threw all of his weight against the door. The door didn't move, so he backed up and threw his shoulder into the door again. The door swung open, and Ignis stared at the scene for a second, eyes wide in horror. The floor was covered in spots of blood. His eyes followed the trail, landing on the blond who was huddled in the corner, his right hand holding his left wrist tightly as blood seeped out from between his fingers. Ignis quickly composed himself and rushed to Prompto's side. He glanced at the bloody knife, shuddering as he suddenly realized what had happened. Loud footsteps sounded from the hallway and within seconds, Noctis and Gladio appeared in the doorway, looking between Ignis and Prompto, their eyes full of confusion and fear.

"Noct, we don't have any potions at the moment, so I'll need you to run out and buy a few," Ignis instructed, as he removed Prompto's hand from the gash so he could get a better look. Noctis nodded, sparing one last horrified look at his friend before he rushed out the door.

"Let's move you to the kitchen so I can get a better look," Ignis said to Prompto as calmly as he could. Ignis helped him to his feet and grabbed his arm, supporting him as he stumbled into the kitchen. He sat on the chair, and Ignis brought another chair over so he was sitting next to Prompto.

Ignis grabbed a towel and held it to the blond's wrist, silently begging Noctis to hurry. They sat there in silence, waiting for the prince to return. Prompto rested his head against the table, trying to avoid the stares of the other two that never seemed to leave him. He hissed as Ignis pressed harder on the cuts, and the other apologized, though he didn't let up.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Gladio growled at the younger, his fear coming out as anger. Tears welled up in Prompto's eyes as he stared at the larger man. He never wanted this. He never wanted them to know, and he definitely didn't want them to find him like this.

"Gladio, calm down," Ignis said as he noticed that the yelling was upsetting Prompto.

"Calm down?! How do you expect me to calm down when Prompto just tried to kill himself?!"

"I didn't try to kill myself," Prompto mumbled, trying to defend himself.

"Oh, really. What the hell do you call that then?" Gladio asked, his eyes drifting down to the younger's wrists.

"I just wanted the voices to stop," he replied staring at the table. Ignis froze, studying the blond with concern.

"What voices, Prompto?" he asked.

"It wouldn't stop. Everytime I did this, it would leave me alone, at least for a while," his eyes wouldn't meet Ignis's.

"What did these voices say?" the advisor asked him, grabbing his chin, forcing Prompto to look at him. His heart ached as he saw the pain in the blue eyes that stared back at him. The blond shook his head, eyes glancing at every part of Ignis's face except for his eyes. Suddenly the door burst open, and Noctis rushed in with a couple of potions in his hands.

"I got the potions," Noctis said, struggling to catch his breath as he handed the potions to Ignis. He thanked the prince as he took them and handed one of them to Prompto. Prompto crushed it in his hand, flinching at the sensation of the wounds on his wrist closing up. He glanced down and saw that all that was left of the cuts were small red scars. He could feel the burning stares of the others on him and he shifted in his seat. He hated being the center of attention, and he could tell from the look on Gladio's face that he was furious. They sat in silence for a few moments, no one wanting to actually talk about what had just happened, but they knew it needed to be done.

"What did you mean when you said you wanted the voices to go away?" Ignis finally asked, leaning forward in his chair. His eyes never left Prompto as he watched the internal struggle that seemed to take place in him.

"I, uh, I don't know how to describe it," he hesitated a moment, trying to think of the best way to describe it. "It's like this tiny voice whispering in the back of my mind, telling me all the things I did wrong. Telling me all the things I am."

"And what exactly does it say?" Noctis asked, a hint of anger in his voice. Prompto gulped as he looked to his friend leaning against the wall. He never wanted Noctis to know what he thought of himself.

"Prom, tell me," the prince encouraged. He had a pretty good idea about what had been going through the other's mind for the past couple of weeks, but until they knew exactly what he was dealing with, they wouldn't be able to help.

"It, it kept telling me how useless I am. How weak and stupid I am. How you guys don't want me. How I'm nothing," his voice grew quieter with each word as he held back the sobs that threatened to come out. He ran his fingers through his hair, gripping it tightly and pulling as he suddenly felt air felt like it had been sucked out of the room, and he began gasping, trying to take a deep breath. He was vaguely aware of a hand rubbing circles on his back as soothing words were whispered. He gasped for air, closing his eyes as he took a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before slowly letting it back out. He did this a few more times, and each time it felt like he breathed in more air than the last. As his breathing evened out, he opened his eyes. Noctis was kneeling in front of him, his face inches away as his eyes searched Prompto's face. Ignis hadn't left his chair, but his hand was on the blond's back, still rubbing calming circles. Gladio's hand hovered near Prompto as if he thought he might fall over at any moment.

"You with us?" Noctis asked once Prompto opened his eyes again. He nodded, shrugging off Ignis's hand.

"I'm fine," he replied.

"That didn't look 'fine' to me," Gladio said, pulling his hand back.

"A panic attack, I presume," Ignis told the others. "Perhaps you should rest. You lost quite a bit of blood, and it's been a very stressful morning. We'll talk about this later." He helped Prompto out of the chair and over to the bed. The blond let out a sigh of relief as he pulled the covers over himself. He was absolutely freezing, and the warmth of the bed felt _so_ good. His eyes suddenly felt heavy, and he struggled to keep them open. He let them close, and a few minutes later, he was fast asleep.

"What are we supposed to do about this?" Noctis asked, watching his best friend sleep peacefully. Ignis sat at the table, one hand massaging his temple as he thought. He had never dealt with this kind of thing before, and he had absolutely no idea where to go from here.

"I guess we just take things one step at a time and hope we can help him through this," the advisor replied.


	5. Chapter 5

Prompto woke up, stretching his arms, and for a second, he forgot the events of the last few hours. He heard hushed voices coming from the kitchen, and everything came crashing down on him like a ton of bricks. He groaned softly as he burrowed further under the blankets, wishing he could hide for the rest of his life. The voices suddenly stopped, and footsteps slowly approached the bed.

"Prompto," Ignis asked as a gentle hand was placed on his shoulder. "Prompto, we need to talk."

"Do I have to?" he whispered, peering up at the advisor. He nodded, sympathy written on his face. He pulled the blanket off, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. Noctis sat next to him, and Ignis and Gladio sat across from them on the other bed. They sat in silence for a few moments, looking at each other as they struggled to start the conversation. Ignis cleared his throat as he stared pointedly at Noctis, trying to get him to say something. He figured Prompto would be more open talking to Noctis since the prince was his best friend.

"So, Prom..." Noctis started as he rubbed at the back of his neck. He had never seen his friend look so miserable and defeated, and frankly it scared him more than anything. He wanted so badly to help him, but he knew nothing he said could make it disappear.

"Yeah?" the blond asked after another couple seconds of silence. He glanced up at his friends, eyes darting nervously between the three. Noctis opened his mouth but quickly closed it again as he struggled to find the right thing to say.

"We need you to talk to us," Ignis stepped in. "We need to know what's going on with you in order to help you."

"I don't know, dude. I don't know what's wrong with me," Prompto whispered, gritting his teeth as he tried to keep his emotions under control. "I just, I just can't do this anymore."

"Do what?" Noctis asked, glad that they were finally getting _something_ out of him.

"I can't…I hate feeling like this. I hate feeling like I'm…" he stopped, glancing at the others. He didn't want them to know. He felt really vulnerable at the moment, and he absolutely hated it. Surprisingly it was Gladio who encouraged him to go on.

"Go ahead, Prompto," the shield said. "I promise, we won't judge you."

"I… I hate feeling like I'm inferior to everyone. I'm tired of feeling like I'm nothing," Prompto told them, digging his nails into his palm as he waited for the others' reactions.

"Prompto," Noctis said as he placed a comforting hand on his friend's back. A small smile spread across his face as his gaze softened. "You aren't nothing. You're my best friend. No you're not just my best friend, you're my brother."

"I know. I _know,_ but no matter how many times I tell myself that, there's still this small voice that gives me a hundred reasons why that's wrong. No matter what I do, it won't go away. And then I screw up again, and the voice starts telling me 'see, this is why you're such a failure'." Prompto's voice cracked as he held back the tears that burned his eyes, blurring his vision. The others were silent for a moment, unsure of what to say. Now that it was out in the open, no one really knew what to do. How can you help someone when what they're really fighting is themselves?

Prompto chewed on his lips, unsure of how to take the others' silence. They're faces were a mix of multiple different emotions, and he had no idea what they were thinking about or how they felt about what he had just said. He bounced his leg up and down as he waited for someone, anyone, to say something.

Gladio looked to Ignis, hoping the advisor would take it from here. He and the prince weren't really good when it came to feelings and emotions. Ignis gave him an exasperated look as he turned to Prompto, grabbing his chin and forcing his eyes to look into his own.

"We'll help you get through this," he said simply. Prompto pressed his lips together and gave a slight nod, eyes shining with unshed tears. Prompto glanced at the bathroom, eyes landing on the pools of blood still staining the floor. Pushing himself off the bed, he walked into the kitchen and filled a container with water. He grabbed a towel and knelt on the hard tile, scrubbing at the spots. _Look what you did,_ he thought to himself. _Why do you have to be so weak? You should have just ended it._ He felt tears fall down his cheeks as he clenched his jaw, taking his anger out on the tile.

Noctis stood in the doorway, watching as Prompto scrubbed harder and harder, and concern grew in him as the blond continued to scrub at the spot even when the blood was completely gone. He placed a hand on his back and quickly pulled it away as the other flinched a little, turning to look at his friend. Without a word, Noctis took the towel from his hand and pulled him to his feet, motioning for Gladio to take him into the other room. Prompto's eyes didn't leave the bloody floor until the shield dragged him into the kitchen. Noctis knelt on the floor and began scrubbing, trying to ignore the fact that all this blood was Prompto's. He knew that no matter what he did, he would never be able to get the image of his best friend bleeding out on the floor out of his mind. The only thing he could do was be there for him and make sure it never _ever_ happened again.

Prompto sat at the table, watching the back of Noctis's hunched over figure as a wave of guilt washed over him. Noctis shouldn't have to do that. He shouldn't be cleaning up his messes for him. He glanced over at Gladio who stood leaning against the wall, arms crossed as he stared at the blond. Prompto laid his head on the table, yawning as he listened to the sounds around him. He knew he shouldn't feel this tired after having just slept, but he struggled to keep his eyes open as the monotonous sounds around him seemed to lull him to sleep.

"You alright over there?" a gruff voice asked. He opened one eye sluggishly, sighing as he saw Gladio walk over to stand right next to him.

"'M fine," he muttered, burying his head in his arms. He really didn't feel like talking to anyone. All he wanted to do was sleep. He walked over to the bed, flopping face down on the mattress and pulling the covers around him, shielding him from the outside world.

He must have fallen asleep for short time because he was jerked out of sleep by a hand roughly shaking his shoulders. "Food's ready," Noctis said, continuing to shake his shoulders.

"Not really hungry right now," he said, voice muffled by the blankets.

"Uh-uh. No. You're not doing this," the prince replied as he yanked the cover off. "You haven't been eating much. You're going to eat, even if I have to shove it down your throat." Noctis laughed, but he was only half joking about forcing his friend to eat.

Prompto groaned as Noctis dragged him to the kitchen table where a plate of food was already sitting at a spot. He sat down, staring at the mountain of food with distaste. He really didn't want to eat, but after everything he had put the others through, he felt like he needed to at least eat a little.

He pushed the food around for a few moments, feeling the burning stare of his friends on him. He took a bite, chewing it slowly as he glanced at the others. Ignis nodded in satisfaction, taking a bite of his own food. Noctis started a meaningless conversation, sensing that Prompto was feeling a little uncomfortable with everyone staring at him. The blond continued to pick at his food, distracted by the conversation, and before he knew it, he had eaten half of what was on the plate. He pushed it away, unable to eat anymore, and Ignis nodded, satisfied with the amount.

As the others cleaned up, Prompto glanced at the knife that the others had confiscated from his bag. He wandered over to the counter, laying a hand on it as he struggled to fight off the sudden urge to cut himself. He didn't know why he even wanted to hurt himself, but it was all he could think about.

Ignis stopped washing the dishes as he saw Prompto's hand clench around the handle of the knife. He was about to take it from him, but Gladio beat him to it.

"What are you doing?" Gladio asked, carefully take the knife from the blond.

"I-I don't know," Prompto replied, glancing between the shield and the knife.

"How can we help you if you don't want our help," Gladio growled as he placed the knife next to Ignis.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. Gladio sighed, running his fingers through his hair as he grabbed the blond's arm, walking him back over to the kitchen table. Prompto played with his wrist band as he waited for the others to finish up. _You can't escape me,_ the small voice whispered in his mind. _You'll never get rid of me._


	6. Chapter 6

Prompto sat with his head in his hands as he examined the grain of the wooden table. He didn't know what to do. He knew the others would probably put their current mission of getting to Altissia on hold until he was better, and he hated that he caused all of them so much grief. _They should just leave me here,_ he thought to himself. _I'm just holding them back._ He glanced at Noctis who was checking his phone occasionally, most likely seeing what time it was. Ignis and Gladio had gone out about an hour ago to get supplies since it looked like they would be staying at the motel a few more nights than planned. When Noctis realized Prompto was watching him, he smiled at him though the smile never reached his eyes.

"Can things just go back to the way they were?" Prompto asked, knowing it was a naive question.

Noctis stared at his friend with pity. He wished it could be the same, but he knew that it would be a while before they could put this behind them. "You know it's not that simple, Prom."

Prompto sighed, nodding his head as he lowered it to rest on his arms. "Do you think the others will be back soon?"

"Probably," the prince replied with a shrug. The room was silent again, and it drove Prompto nuts.

"I'm going for a walk," he said, grabbing his camera from his bag.

"I'll come with," Noctis told him, scrambling out of his chair. Prompto stopped for a second, staring at Noctis. He wasn't one to willingly go for walks.

"I can go by myself," he assured him as he opened the door.

"I'll come with you," Noctis repeated firmly, walking past him and out the door. Prompto suddenly realized what he was doing. Noctis didn't want him going by himself because he was afraid he would try and hurt himself again. Prompto frowned, staring at the ground as he walked beside Noctis. They walked in silence for a little bit, and Noctis stopped, not really sure where the blond had planned on going.

"Where are we headed?" Noctis asked as he glanced over at his friend.

"I was just going to walk around a little. No specific place, just get some fresh air." Prompto had wanted to come out by himself and clear his head to see if it would help make him feel better, but with Noctis hovering, it only made him feel worse than before. _They don't trust you_. _They think you can't do anything by yourself anymore._ Anger built up in Prompto as they continued to walk on. He didn't need a babysitter. He could handle himself, and if he wanted to cut his wrists to make himself feel better, who were his friends to stop him?

"You okay?" Noctis asked, seeing the anger on his face. He had no idea what was going on, but Prompto didn't anger easily.

"Of course I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be," Prompto said, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. He really didn't want to talk to Noctis at the moment. He knew he had no reason to be angry, but he couldn't help himself. He was angry at the whole situation he had found himself in. _How did this even happen,_ he asked himself as his rage suddenly switched to sadness and despair.

They continued walking, leaving the town behind as they followed the road across a bridge. Prompto paused halfway over the bridge and leaned on the railing, staring down at the sparkling water and the fish that swam around, causing ripples in the water as their fins occasionally cut through the surface.

Noctis stopped once he noticed that Prompto was no longer following him, and turned back. He stood a foot away from his friend, not wanting to crowd him when he obviously wanted time to himself.

"You realize I don't need you with me every second of the day, right?" Prompto asked, though he never looked up at the prince.

"I realize that, but while you're struggling with this… whatever it is," he said, but stumbled as he tried to find the right words to say. "We want to make sure that you're safe. We want to make sure that you know that you can talk to us about whatever. We're here for you, Prom."

Prompto turned to him, lips turned up in a half smile. "Thanks, Noct." Just then, Noctis's phone buzzed, and he reached for it answering it.

"Where are you," a deep, concerned voice growled.

"Prompto wanted to go for a walk," Noctis replied, rolling his eyes. He was a little surprised at the tone the shield was using. He had never heard Gladio so worried, and seeing this side of him reminded him that Gladio really did care about all of them, including Prompto.

"Oh, good. We were worried something happened when we got back to the room and you weren't there." Noctis glanced over at Prompto who was watching him with interest, obviously straining to listen to what was being said on the other end.

"Nope. Prom just needed some air. I figured I'd go with him," he replied. "We'll be back shortly."

"Got it," came the simple answer as the shield hung up. Prompto leaned over the railing and bowed his head, hiding his face from Noctis so he couldn't read the expression on his face. He hated that everyone's time was now taken up by constantly checking up on him. He closed his eyes as he listened to Noctis shift closer to him, and he flinched a little as the prince laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Ready to head back?" Noctis asked as he grabbed his shoulder, turning him to face him. Prompto nodded, staring at his shoes as they made their way back to the town. They entered the motel room and Prompto immediately plopped down on the bed. He felt so physically and emotionally exhausted, and all he wanted to do was sleep.

Ignis watched, slightly concerned as Prompto walked in the door and went straight to the bed, curling up in a ball with his back facing the others. He glanced at Noctis, wondering if something had happened on their walk, but the prince just shrugged, giving one last look at his friend before sitting at the kitchen table with the others.

"We shouldn't stay here much longer," Gladio told the others. Ignis knew he was right, but he couldn't help but feel that Prompto needed some time to get over this struggle, and rushing off to Altissa would not help the situation.

"We can't. We need to figure out what to do to help Prompto before we can even think about leaving," Noctis said, keeping his voice low, so Prompto wouldn't be able to hear.

"We can't just put everything on hold. We have a mission, Noct."

"It can wait," the prince ground out through gritted teeth, suddenly getting angry at the lack of concern for Prompto. He knew Gladio's first priority was keeping him safe and on task, but he figured after everything they had all been through, he would at least understand that Prompto needed a break from everything so he could deal with this.

"Look, I understand that he needs time, but we can't just stay here." The two continued to argue, and Ignis sat, half listening to the hushed conversation. He saw both sides, and his caring side told him that self harm was a serious problem and they should give Prompto as much time as he needed.

"Guys?" a quiet voice said from the bed. Prompto was sitting, scratching at his wrist, his face betraying his absolute misery.

"What's wrong, Prompto," Ignis asked as he stood up from the table and made his way over to sit across from the blond. He glanced between the advisor and the floor, hesitating as he thought about what he should say.

"I... Noct said that if I needed anything...he said I could tell you guys anything and…" he stumbled over his words as he struggled to tell them what was going on. "I-I want to stop hurting myself, but right now I…" he trailed off, eyes drifting over to the knife on the counter.

Ignis followed his line of sight, shifting over a few steps to block the blond's view. "Ok, Prompto. That's good. Making the decision to stop is the first step in recovery," he said. Knowing that the knife was tempting the blond, he placed the knife in one of the drawers, hoping it would help take his mind off the urge.

"Why don't we go take a look around the area? I'm sure there are some great places to take pictures," Ignis suggested. He knew the blond couldn't refuse the opportunity to get a good photo and, after a few moments of contemplation, Prompto nodded a trace of his usual smile back on his face. He grabbed his camera, following the others to the regalia.

"Where to?" Ignis asked, turning to Prompto as he started the car. The other shrugged as he fiddled with his camera. "Okay, I guess we'll just drive around and stop if something catches your eye. Does that sound good to you?"

"Sure," Prompto replied, leaning his head against the headrest and stared out at the scenery. As they drove by a large mountain, he perked up, eyes widening at the unique shape of it. "Iggy, can we stop there?" he asked as he pulled on Ignis's sleeve and pointed at the mountain. Ignis tried to hide his smile as he glanced over, noticing the small glimmer of excitement in his blue eyes. He hadn't seen him this excited in long time, and Ignis loved to see him acting like himself again. Once Ignis pulled the car over and parked, Prompto clumsily clamored out of the car in his haste to find the perfect place to take the picture. He pulled his camera out and turned it on as he looked through it to see how the picture would look.

"Lighting's not good," he said with a hum of disapproval. "The sun's right behind the mountain. Maybe if we got closer…" he trailed off as he headed towards the large rock. The others followed, allowing him time to check multiple different spots along the way. "Here," he said as he set up his tripod. "This spot is perfect!" He placed the camera on the tripod and rushed over to the others as they stood together in front of the mountain. "Everybody say cheese!" He heard the tell tale click of the camera capturing the picture and rushed over, checking to make sure it was good. His eyes lit up as he turned the camera around to show the others, and for the first time in a long time, he felt like everything was going to be alright.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Sorry this took so long. I got stuck on what to do for this chapter, but here it is. Also thank you to everyone who has followed, favorited, and reviewed this story. I really appreciate it.**

Prompto woke feeling more rested than he had in weeks. He rubbed his eyes with a yawn and sat up, looking around for the others. He found them sitting at the kitchen table playing a card game, and he quickly got up, taking the empty seat.

"Morning," Noctis said, glancing up from his cards.

"Morning. Can I play next round?" he asked with a smile on his face. Prompto hadn't been in this good of a mood in a long time, and he suddenly had the motivation to actually do things instead of just lying around.

"Uh, sure," Noct replied a little taken aback by the blond's energy. He smiled to himself as the old Prompto slowly began to show through the depression that had taken over his friend. Prompto continued to watch with interest as the other three played on.

"So," Gladio said, glancing over at Prompto. "You're looking better."

"I feel great," Prompto said, stretching his arms over his head as he leaned back in his seat.

"Think you'd be up for getting back on the road?" Noctis asked him, still not sure if he should push him.

"Yeah, I'm up for whatever." Noctis studied him for a moment, searching for any sign that he was lying.

"Cool," he replied. He looked back down at his cards. They continued to play a few more rounds, until Ignis stood and began packing up his things in the kitchen.

"I guess that means we should start packing too," Noctis said as he put the cards away.

"I think he's just tired of losing," Gladio replied with a smirk.

They soon found themselves in the regalia, and Prompto pulled his camera out and snapped a couple pictures of the scenery. He turned around his seat to say something to Noctis, but found his eyes were closed and he was drooling slightly. The blonde chuckled to himself as he took a quick picture of his sleeping friend. Gladio held his book tightly, trying to stop the wind from turning the pages on him. Prompto rested his head on the side of the car as he stared out at the trees and creatures they past.

After a few hours of driving, he began flipping through the radio stations. He frowned as each song he changed to was more annoying or boring than the one before. Ignis glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, and he flinched a little at every change of the station.

"Perhaps you could find something else to do," Ignis suggested, wanting desperately for him to pick a station.

"Oh, sorry," Prompto mumbled as he turned the music off. He ducked his head, avoiding the irritated glance of the advisor. He chewed on his lip as he tapped his fingers against his thigh. That feeling of anxiety and worthlessness he had become so used to came back full force as he sat in the silence of the car. He glanced behind him to see Noctis, wide awake and staring at the back of Ignis's seat looking just as bored as Prompto felt.

"Hey, Noct. Want to play some King's Knight?" he asked with a small smile.

"Sure," the prince replied. He didn't really feel like playing, but he could tell from the look on his friends face that he needed something to distract him.

As the sun started to set, Ignis spotted a sign for a motel a few miles down the road. "Perhaps we should stop there for the night," Ignis told the others.

"Sounds good," Noctis replied. "The daemons will probably be coming out any minute. I really don't feel like dealing with them."

Ignis pulled into the parking lot of the motel, and the others grabbed the bags while Ignis paid for the room. As soon as they entered the room, Prompto flopped face first on the bed. Prompto listened to the sounds of the others moving around as he struggled to keep his eyes open. He was so tired, why was he so tired? He didn't have any energy to stay awake any longer and he let himself drift off to sleep.

He was startled out of his sleep about an hour later by someone roughly shaking his shoulders.

"Food's ready," Gladio told him as he walked back out into the kitchen area. Prompto groaned, a little annoyed that Gladio woke him up just for food. He trudged into the kitchen and slumped into one of the chairs. He rubbed his eyes as he tried to wake himself up completely. Ignis placed a plate in front of him, and he dug in, wanting desperately to return to the comfort of the bed. All of them were quiet, and Prompto noticed Ignis was still watching him occasionally while he ate.

"Don't worry, Iggy. I'll eat it all," he mumbled as he shoveled another spoonful in his mouth. Ignis nodded, and turned away from the blond.

Once everybody had finished, Ignis stood and collected the plates. "We should all get some rest. I would like to leave early tomorrow morning," he said, looking pointedly at Prompto. Prompto nodded in understanding as he handed his plate to Ignis.

"Want help with cleaning up?" he asked, hopping out of his chair. With a nod from Ignis, he walked over to the sink and began to wash the plates. Ignis grabbed a towel and dried off the clean dishes as Prompto handed them to him.

"How do you feel today?" Ignis pried, not taking his eyes off of the pot in his hands. Prompto stopped scrubbing at the plate, and for a moment, Ignis thought he might Prompto might blow up at him. The blond simply shrugged and returned to scrubbing. "I want to make sure you're feeling okay," Ignis pushed as he placed the pot on the counter.

"I'm fine," Prompto replied through gritted teeth as he scrubbed harder at a spot on the plate. Ignis got the message; he didn't want to talk about it anymore. They finished cleaning up in silence, and Prompto made a beeline for the bed which Noctis was already in, and he looked like he had fallen asleep already. Prompto crawled into the bed and tried to fall asleep, but he tossed and turned all night. He felt tired, but something in him just wouldn't let him sleep.

Prompto turned onto his other side with a groan as he checked the clock for the fifth time that night. 3:22 a.m. He stared up at the ceiling and tapped his fingers against the his leg. He wished more than anything that he could just fall asleep. He buried his head in his pillow, muffling the whimper that escaped his lips. _Just because you had fun yesterday doesn't mean I'm going to leave you alone,_ the voice in his mind said, making itself known again. _Will I ever be happy again?_ he asked himself as his tears soaked the pillowcase. _Of course not. You don't deserve to be happy. You're a monster._ He held his wrist up to his face, letting his eyes look over the wristband. _I'm not. I'm not a monster!_ He sat up straight, clawing at his chest as the familiar feeling of panic filled his chest. He suddenly couldn't breathe right. His eyes darted around the room frantically as he struggled to control his breathing. The walls seemed to be closing in on him, and he couldn't focus on anything. _I need to get out of here,_ he thought to himself. He scrambled out of the bed, trying his best not to wake Noctis who was snoring quietly next to him. He opened the door and carefully closed it with a soft click. He found himself on the roof of the motel, and he paced back and forth as he fought with himself. _You can't possibly believe you could ever be happy, you worthless freak. You don't deserve friends. You don't deserve love. You don't even deserve the pathetic life you have._ "Just go away _,_ " he pleaded, pulling at his hair. _There's only one way to end it. Only one way to get rid of me._ Prompto's eyes drifted over to the edge of the roof as he felt a sudden urge to throw himself off. "No, I can't," he mumbled to himself as he backed up a few steps. _No one will miss you. Just do it. Just end it here and now._ He shook his head as he paced back and forth. He took a shaky breath as he stepped closer and peered over the edge. He stepped onto the edge as tears streamed down his face. _I have to end this. I can't do this anymore,_ he thought to himself. _I'm sorry Noct._

"Prompto, what are you doing!"


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: So this is the final chapter. Thank you so much for following this story. I can't tell you how much I appreciate all the readers and the reviews.**

Noctis groaned as he sat up in bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he heard the soft click of the door close. He squinted, scanning the room though he couldn't really see anything in the dark. As his foggy mind began to clear, Noctis realized Prompto was no longer lying in the bed.

"Prompto," he called, voice barely above a whisper. There was no answer. He looked to where he knew the bathroom was, but no light seeped out from under the door. He climbed out of bed and stumbled as he bumped against the other bed. He cringed as he heard a mumble, and the large figure of Gladio jolted up in the bed.

"What the hell is going on?" he growled.

"Sorry, Gladio," Noctis replied. "I can't find Prompto."

"Did you check the bathroom?" he asked, suddenly alert. Noctis nodded as a sleepy Ignis flipped on the light. He put his glasses on and blinked a couple of times as he tried to focus.

"What's going on?" Ignis asked, stretching his arms over his head.

"Prompto's missing," Gladio told him. Ignis jumped out of bed, and Noctis pulled his boots on as he grabbed his jacket heading for the door, Gladio and Ignis not far behind him. He dashed down the motel stairs and slid to a stop in front of the front desk. The attendant blinked at him, obviously not expecting anybody to stop by in the middle of the night.

"Have you seen a blond guy walk by recently? He has blond hair, blue eyes and freckles." Noctis bounced on the balls of his feet as he waited impatiently for the man's answer.

"Nah, haven't seen a single soul 'til you showed up," he replied. The man rested his head on his arm again, and Noctis sighed in frustration.

Noctis sighed, and turned to the other two. "Where else could he be?" he asked, looking for any suggestions.

"There's not really anywhere he could have gone without passing the desk. Perhaps he went to the roof to get some air," Ignis said. Noctis nodded at him as he ran up the multiple flights of stairs. He shoved the large metal door open and froze as he saw Prompto leaning over the side of the building, way too close to the edge. Noctis's chest tightened as he started to panic.

"Prompto, what are you doing!" he exclaimed as he took a hesitant step forward. He heard a slight gasp behind him, and assumed the others were right there, but Noctis didn't dare take his attention off of Prompto. The blond didn't turn, but Noctis saw his shoulders tense a little.

"Leave me alone, Noct," he replied. Noctis winced at the absolute misery in his best friend's voice.

"What are you doing?" Noctis repeated, as calmly as he could. He took another step forward, and he glanced behind him to see Gladio and Ignis staring warily at Prompto.

"Just leave me alone. I-I don't want you to see this." His voice cracked a little at the end, and the others could tell he either had been or was crying. The prince reached his hand out to touch Prompto, but he pulled it back, unsure of what to do in this situation. Prompto was way too close to the edge, and Noctis didn't want to startle him. Noctis looked to Ignis who was usually level headed enough to deal with these kind of things.

"See what, Prompto?" Ignis asked, sensing Noctis's uncertainty. A soft sob escaped the blond as he shifted his weight ever so slightly.

"You can't be here." He lifted his arm, and Noctis could tell he was wiping a tear from his eye.

"Prompto, I'm not leaving you. I'll _never_ leave you," Noctis insisted.

"You need to talk to us so we can work this out," Gladio said. "We can only help you if you tell us what's going on."

"That's just it, you can't help me!" Prompto shouted. He shifted closer to the edge, his feet mere centimeters from sending him plummeting to his death. The other three flinched, and Noctis took a few more steps closer.

"You're not alone, Prompto. I'm here for you; _we're_ here for you." Noctis gestured to Ignis and Gladio even though Prompto's back was to him. "You just have to tell us what's going on."

"I can't take it anymore, Noct. I can't take the sleepless nights. I can't stand the feeling that I'm not...that I'm not good enough to be here with you guys. That I don't belong," Prompto ran his fingers through his hair as he glanced back at Noctis, staring at him with glassy bloodshot eyes.

"Of course you belong with us. You're my best friend, and I wouldn't want anyone else on this trip with me. I need you, Prompto. Please, don't leave me," Noctis pleaded, his eyes burning as tears streamed down his face. Prompto's expression softened a little as he turned back to stare at the pavement below.

Prompto chewed on his lip as he struggled with himself. He wanted it to end. He wanted desperately to rid himself of this awful feeling that had plagued him for so long. But he couldn't do that to Noct. Could he? Noct would get over him. He would move on. Prompto didn't matter that much. The prince could easily find himself a new friend. Suddenly Prompto's mind drifted to the different times he and the prince had gone to the arcade, and he remembered the fun they had beating each others high score. He thought back to the time when Noctis had helped him study for the math test that he needed to ace in order to pass. Noct had been dead tired, but he stayed up all night quizzing him on the material. No one would do that for someone they didn't really care about. Prompto let out a sob as he gripped his hair tightly. He only had one shot at this. It was now or never. If he got down off the roof, he would probably never get another opportunity like this.

He made the mistake of looking back. Noctis was staring at him, eyes wide and filled with tears as he reached his hand out for Prompto to grab. The blond's eyes flicked over to Ignis who looked as if he were about to break down, and then he glanced at Gladio who, for the first time since Prompto had known the shield, looked like he might actually cry. He felt any determination he had to throw himself off the roof leave him.

 _I can't do that to them_ , he said to himself.

Noctis watched as resignation flashed across his best friend's face and for a split second, he swore he was about to jump. Noct squeezed his eyes shut tightly; he didn't want to watch. He _couldn't_ watch. Then something grabbed onto his outstretched hand, and his eyes flew open as he pulled the sobbing blond into a hug. Gladio quickly positioned himself between Prompto and the edge of the roof as the gunner sobbed into Noctis's shoulder. Prompto went to pull away, slightly embarrassed that he was crying in front of them, but Noctis held on tightly, not willing to let him go.

"Did you mean what you said?" Prompto asked, voice muffled by the fabric of the prince's shirt.

"Every word."

Ignis ushered them back to the room, wrapping a blanket around the shivering blond, though he was positive the violent shaking wasn't from the cold. He poured everyone except Prompto a cup of coffee; he knew no one would be sleeping the rest of that night.

"Remember that time I skipped training and we went out and bought our first ever Assassin's Creed game?" Noctis asked, trying desperately to lighten the mood. Prompto smiled at him and nodded as he took the mug Ignis was offering him.

"I remember perfectly," Gladio grumbled as he remembered how pissed he had been, though what seemed like a big deal back then felt insignificant after the past couple weeks they'd just dealt with.

Noctis rolled his eyes and continued. "We stayed up all night playing that game. I was terrible at it at first, but you got the hang of it right away. You always were better at video games than me."

"You've got that right," Prompto replied smugly. They sat in silence for a few minutes, and Prompto knew in that moment that things between the four of them had changed. He understood that it would take a long time for everyone to get past this. He realized they would probably be watching him closely for a bit just to make sure he was okay, and he was fine with that.

"I'm sorry," he said as he stared at the table. "I didn't mean for all of this to happen." The others were silent for a moment, and the only sound to be heard was Prompto's knuckles tapping against the wood anxiously.

"You really scared me tonight," Noctis said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I thought… I thought I was going to lose you. Promise you won't _ever_ do that again." Prompto lifted his gaze to meet Noctis's.

"I promise," he replied. And he meant it.

Noctis continued to reminisce about other found memories, and for the first time in a long time, the voice in Prompto's head was silent. It felt good to know the others cared, to know he was loved. He realized it would be a struggle and that the voice would probably come back occasionally, but with the others behind him, he knew he'd be okay.


End file.
